I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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