I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
