Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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