I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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