I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
