Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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