Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She's the barista slut.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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