did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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