you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
