I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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