You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
