Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
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His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
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The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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