Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Randomize
