I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
