Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
