ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize