STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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