why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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