Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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