these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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