I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
