What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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