he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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