We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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