i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
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