Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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