operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
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at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
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im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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