operation harelip BJ is a go
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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