oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Randomize
