he puts the penis in happiness.
Just cropdusted the office
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
