i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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