38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
