He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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