Screwed.edu
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
