For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
