dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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