So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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