whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
