thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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