Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
