just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
