Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize