My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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