Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
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Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
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I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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