I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
