i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
