Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
