They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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