if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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