Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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