the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
